Trapped In a Cage, My Testimony

I was born in small town: Troy, NC- current population 3,400. I was born and raised in Troy, and spent my entire life as youth in the same house at the same address. I was raised in church. Running the risk of superfluous clichés: "I cut my teeth on the pews of Troy Church of God". I was raised knowing right from wrong- and having a strong sense of "godly fear". My story is typical. I grew older, and I went astray. I am artistic dude- a hippy in my own rite. Music had a profound influence on my life. At 14 years old, I started running pretty heavy with the other kids on my street; as well as some musicians. This lead to some pretty wild times- and some drug use. Never the hard stuff of course. But, weekends were filled with the adventurous search for weed. We would pile our leftover lunch money together and we would hit the spots where we could score a dime bag- or if we were lucky, a quarter bag. I was in the vicious cycle that is Troy. A cycle, that if I didn't escape, would consume me as it did others.

My life was filled with unrest. I have known since the time I was child that I was called to preach. Here I was, not only committing acts of sin, but feeling myself being pulled deeper and deeper into this lifestyle and loving it. Loving it, and at the same time, dreading it. I was so confused. I was at the place where I doubted even the existence of God. Furthermore, if he was real, I was mad at him. I was mad at him because I felt his dreadful call on my life- and I felt he was trying to take my fun. I wanted so bad to know Him, to feel Him, to love Him. But, he forced me to hate Him, and it made me mad. Looking back, I know that all my feelings were unfounded. At the time, however, they were all too real.

One night I laid in my bed, in the dark, and I let God know how I was feeling. I was 16 years old, almost 17. I laid in the dark and wept, and pumped my fists, and cussed, and beat my pillow. I was mad! Haunted by the irreresistable pull of this ominous being. Convicted by this thunderous love. Shaken by this violent fear. I longed to investigate the mystery that was stalking me, but I was furious that He was so interested me. So I laid awake. And through stuttered cries, in one tired breath, I uttered these words, "God, I just feel like I'm in a cage, and can't get out".

The next day was Saturday. And that night we started a weekend revival with the PFCs from East Coast Bible College. Vivid images and sounds from the services that weekend still dance in my mind. That night, during the song "Shout to the Lord", I made my way down the altar. I knew the date God had set for He and I to get together had come. A moment divinely ordered in the cosmos, if you will. As I knelt in the altar, sobs as my only language, I felt a hand on my shoulder. In my ear, one of those college students whispered these words, "God told me to tell you, that the only reason you're still in that cage is because you refuse to turn the other way and walk out the unlocked door". Someone who had never known me, had heard from God concerning the words I spoke to Him last night before I went to sleep. At that moment, waves of supernatural cleansing washed over my soul. That meeting with Christ has forever changed my life. I went the opposite way.

I recently heard this new song by Leeland: "The Opposite Way". This song resonated with me, because it's alomost like they're singing my testimony. Watch the video below and enjoy.

Living in the same town
For all these years
Doing the same old things
Hanging with the same crowd
And it’s starting to get crippling
You’ve never felt in place
And you tell yourself it’s all okay
But something’s different today
You want to run the opposite way

And it seems like you’re locked in a cage
And you need to find a way of escape
When everyone is setting the pace
It’s okay to run the opposite way

The Father sent His Son down
The light of men
The cross He bore was crippling
Rejected in His own town
They couldn’t see the sun shining
He knelt in the garden and prayed
Father, let this cup pass from me
It’s not Your will for me to stay
Your will for me is the opposite way

And it seemed like He was locked in a cage
And He couldn’t find away of escape
But through the cross He conquered the grave
My Jesus ran the opposite way

Oh, and through the cross He conquered the grave
Oh, He ran the opposite way
Yeah, through the cross He conquered the grave
So you could run the opposite way